RAW CHOCOLATE AND DATE BALLS

I hadn't actually planned to write about these delicious little treats but if you're a dark chocolate lover then you probably need to try them.  I don't have a major sweet tooth and I'm generally pretty good at keeping my sugar intake to a minimum (with the exception of my weekly doughnut after doing the grocery shop) so I was looking for something healthy to get me through that afternoon lull. I found these chocolate and date balls over at Petite Kitchen (a New Zealand food blog seriously worth checking out) and they really hit the spot.  They're only sweetened with dates and have a ton of raw cacao powder in them for a serious chocolate kick.  I should warn you that Ayana managed to polish off half the mixture before we even rolled them into balls and proceeded to run around like a lunatic hyped up on cacao for the next hour.  So if you're making these with your kids (which is awesome because they really enjoy rolling them and dipping them in coconut) you have been warned!
I can't claim this recipe to be my own, so you can find it here.
Let me know what you think. x

AND THEN THERE WERE FOUR

Dress: 70s Batik retro dress that belonged to my grandmother (it was floor length and I had it taken up)

Firstly, sorry about the blur!  I'm not sure what went wrong there but I kind of like it. 
Secondly, there's another little family member baking!  A quick test on New Years Eve day confirmed that the glass of bubbles I was so much looking forward to sipping on later in the evening was not to be.  I won't lie, I was having trouble coming to terms with having a second baby.  Now that it's happening it all feels so right though.  Of course we were always meant to be a family of four, we both knew that all along!  And as for Ayana, I know she's going to be an incredible sister to this kid. 

The first trimester of this pregnancy has definitely felt a little less forgiving than with Ayana.  I put it down to being woken up by a cheerful toddler at 6am (if we're lucky) most mornings and then having to keep up with her for the rest of the day.  There are none of those days where you can just flop yourself from the bed, to the couch and back again.  Especially not when you're in the middle of one of the most incredible summers (weather wise) on record.  The show must go on!  I'm fairly certain the nausea stepped it up a notch too.  I planted so many amazing vegetables in the garden and do you think I want to eat any of them?  Corn, basil, salads... agh the thought of them still makes me feel sick.  For a while I could have eaten a falafal  kebab with extra chilli everyday, but that's the only real craving I've had.  Ah well, it's all worth it in the end isn't it, and it's amazing how fast you forget those first few months.  I'm slowly feeling better, but until then I'm sticking to a toddler schedule.  Wake up at 6am, nap for a couple of hours after lunch and then off to bed pretty much as soon as Ayana crashes out.  As for my long 'to do' list for this summer, well everything has been put on the back burner!  Fingers crossed we still get a bit of the house painted though.

I'm undecided yet whether I'll do a maternity series like I did with Ayana (you can check it out here).  It sure has been nice to read back on the weeks though and compare them.  We'll see, Tuesday marks the beginning of week 13!
xx

MAMA STYLE ICON/ HANNAH HENDERSON

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Something quite profound happened when I became a mother, something I swore I would never succumb to... I lost my sense of style.  That first year of being waist deep in dirty nappies, sour milk, sleepless nights and lets face it, an absolute loss of social life had me throwing on whatever was lying around that morning.  The strange thing is that I didn't even particularly notice. Prior to having Ayana I had my own vintage store and really enjoyed what I was wearing, now fast forward two years later and I'm at a total loss as to who I've become.  Sometimes the best way to figure out your tastes (be it clothing/ interior etc) is to start pulling together a visual board of what speaks to you.  Hence why I thought I'd start a series on mothers who have managed to hold onto their incredible style.

Hannah Henderson

Owner of the General Store and mama to two incredibly cute kids, Hannah Henderson has a style that speaks to me in volume.  A self confessed jeans addict and believer in comfort, she has such an effortless but eye catching way of putting an outfit together.  It just goes to show that there's nothing wrong with being a jeans and t-shirt kind of gal as long as you do it right!

You can check more of her style out in instagram or read a further interview with her here.

THE FIRST TWO YEARS

Before Ayana was born I had this idea about what life would soon be like.  We would spend quiet mornings at home, she would play happily on the floor beside me, I would spend my days writing and working on my online vintage store.  In the afternoons we would meet friends for coffee and go for long walks on the beach.  The house would be tidy and a home cooked dinner would be on the table every evening.  Of course nothing could have been further from the truth and boy did it leave me in a state of shock.  As much as I loved the girl more than life itself she was what they call 'high need', and looking back now I realise I was (according to Nic probably still am)  also an extremely high need mother.  She clung to me as much as I clung to her, we co-slept but neither of us seemed to sleep a wink, she would never let me put her down so I barely managed to butter myself a piece of toast let alone cook a meal and this continued for well over a year before we finally found solid ground.  If Nic hadn't been there to hold this shaky ship together I don't know how we might have managed.

Fast forward a couple of years and my baby is almost two years old.   She talks (oh boy does she talk), she's sweet, gentle, helpful, silly, hilarious and absolutely everything I could ever wish for her to be.  She still prefers to play with one of us rather than on her own, so I still don't have time to write and I'm about to sell off the remainder of my vintage stock.  Dinner is on the table at 6pm most nights and these days I get a lot of help form Ayana.  She's obsessed, and I mean obsessed with knives and cutting!  So it's her job to cut up the easy vegetables and also taste test sauces for me.  She's my little shadow, where I go she goes.  Sometimes we drive each other nuts, sometimes I admit I envy Nic leaving for work in the morning and having non- toddler conversations and I do crave a bit of alone time, but I'm fast realising that these are fleeting years and I don't want to miss them!
x

INSOMNIA

Right now, right at this very moment I hate cows!  If I wasn't a vegetarian I would march down to the first steak house I come across and demand their largest eye fillet whatever (I'm not familiar with beef cuts) just out of spite.  Harsh I know but sleep deprivation can make a girl do/ think crazy things.  You see I'm going through another bought of insomnia at the moment.  For weeks now I fall into bed exhausted, but as soon as my head hits the pillow my brain switches into overdrive and I'm left mulling over the most ridiculous thoughts all night.  Hmmm I wonder how you would make a Japanese breakfast, would wooden shelving in the garage be a good idea, would an oversized cardigan or a proper coat be best for this winter??  And so these all important questions continue to mull around in mind until the early hours of the morning when I finally nod off.  A couple of hours later (at precisely 5:45) an all mighty dawn chorus (ie the hundreds of sparrows and minor birds that nest in the bamboo outside our room) screech into action and demand that the world wakes up.  Usually before or directly after this I hear another little bird from the room next door calling 'Mama, geddup'.  And so with scratchy red eyes and a less than cheerful attitude I roll out of bed again to start the day.

The fact that I don't sleep at night isn't the cows fault.  I blame my dad for that one.  Insomnia runs rife through his family.  My dad often worked night jobs, my aunt bakes cakes at midnight and from what I've heard  my grandmother wasn't one for going to bed either.  Thankfully I don't suffer from it that badly.  I'm an awful sleeper at the best of times, but insomnia itself only gets me in its grips for a couple of weeks every few months.  My one saving grace during those times is that I nap really well in the afternoon.  To me a long siesta after lunch is just bliss.  When you lay your heavy head on the pillow and within moments you feel yourself drifting further away from reality and closer to wherever it is we go when we're sleeping.  Then suddenly MOOOOOAGHHHHHRRR, and I'm sitting bolt upright in bed again!  MOOOOORRAAAGHHHAAA!  Somebody is murdering the neighbours, they must be!  I feel my heart beating faster... and then I remember the cows.  Those damn cows!  They're not massacring the neighbours, nor is anybody torturing the cows, they just want to be moved.  And it's not even because they're starving, they're just bored.  Social creatures that they are, they don't like to be left in one place for too long and begin demanding entertainment (or a change of scenery).  This special moo is just like a toddler saving a particular whine in order to get attention.  It grates you in that particular way that means you simply can't ignore it.

Well and there you have it, now Ayana is up, I haven't slept a wink and the afternoon must go on!  I just needed to get that off my chest (clearly).  You can expect more crazy rants from me that make no particular sense in the near future.
xx